Starting a caring conversation
If your loved one still has a good memory, access to knowledge about the world around them and the ability to reason with the information presented, they will be capable of following the steps necessary to initiate the transition to a new place of residence. If illness prevents them from doing so, it’s up to the family and loved ones to help make this decision. Healthcare professionals can also help you along the way.
It sometimes happens that a close caregiver may misunderstand how a senior is really feeling. Here are some possible situations that can arise:
- You assume your loved one will feel uprooted when in fact, due to cognitive decline, they no longer recognize whether they are in their own home.
- You believe your loved one is desperate to keep living in their big house, when in reality they no longer have the energy to look after it.
- You don’t want to uproot your loved on, when in reality they feel bored and isolated at home and would enjoy living in a new place with more people.
Remember: perceptions can be deceptive. The important thing is to talk about it!
Suggestions for starting a conversation
Discuss the situation sympathetically
Mom, do you like living alone? Do you think your home is still suitable for your needs and situation?
Explain your reasons
Dad, you’ve had several falls recently. Do you realize that you could break a bone? That would really limit your mobility, and you’d have to use a walker.
Express concern
My love, the stove has been on all day and there could have been a fire. I’m afraid there might be an accident one day.
The importance of familiar objects
The most important thing for a person leaving their home is to regain their sense of security in their new living environment. To help them settle into their new home, bring along familiar and cherished objects, such as photos, blankets, knick-knacks and so on. The caring approach of nursing staff is also crucial in ensuring a harmonious transition.
True or false?
Adapting to a new living environment in old age is impossible.
FALSE
You may think that after spending 50 years in the same house, your loved one won’t be able to adapt to a new living environment, especially if they have NCD.
You might also think that your loved one doesn’t want to leave their home. For example, you think your father is determined to stay in his own home when, in reality, he’s tired of maintaining it.
On the other hand, both of these assumptions could be wrong. That’s why you need to talk to your loved one about their needs, aspirations and concerns.
Remember: a person with NCD can adapt to a new living environment, find their bearings and develop a sense of security. The level of support required to make this happen will vary depending on the individual.